37 Weeks, Thursday
You know the feeling of being so tired that it feels like you're walking through a haze? Where you have a dull headache that won't go away, your throat is dry, your eyes can only open half way, and everything you do seems like you're doing it in quicksand?
That's how I feel right now. I remember feeling this way the one time I stayed up all night cramming for a test in college. I believe they're called "exams", but I didn't really stay long enough to cram for more than one. Anyway, I stayed up all night studying and I remember feeling this way around 6:00 in the morning when it was too late to take a nap and too early to go to class.
Last night I fell asleep around midnight. I woke up at 1:00 AM to pee. I woke up at 2:45 AM to pee. I woke up at 4:15 AM to write a novel. But I ended up just peeing. Then I couldn't get back to sleep. My abdomen was killing me, my chest was constricted, and my nose was so stuffed I literally could not sniff. Plus Russ was giving off a ton of heat and his relaxed breathing, which indicated that he was sleeping comfortably, was too much for me to take. Then Sesame started moving in a way he hasn't moved before. It was AGGRESSIVE! He was bouncing off the walls of my uterus with such stamina that I felt it necessary to wake Russ from his beautiful slumber just so he could feel it.
I had to get up. There was no going back to sleep. I grabbed my pillows, my water, and my crossword book and headed out to the living room. I watched an "Oprah" I had TiVo'd, made myself a waffle and some tea, watched a Style Network show, and finally fell asleep on the couch with Bogie at my feet, at around 6:30. At 8:45 Russ came out to tell me my alarm had gone off. I had set it for some strange reason to make sure I was ready to go to the OB/GYN by 10:45. I NEVER need to set an alarm anymore, but I guess I had a premonition last night.
Bottom line... I'm tired. I miss sleeping through the night. I'm almost afraid to go to sleep tonight because I don't want it to happen again. But I'm going to go wash my face, brush and floss my teeth, and give it a shot. Because that's what we Arches do! We look fear in the face and say, "Up yours, Fear! I'm sleeping whether you want me to or not! I'm no quitter! I'm a sleeper!" That's what we say.
We met The Blonds' baby girl today and heard all of their birthing stories. It was awesome. It's especially good to hear how rough it was, but then see them with their beautiful little girl, laughing at the trials and triumphs of only a few days ago. I know no matter how bad it gets in that hospital room, it'll all be okay shortly thereafter. I am so excited!!!!!!!!
I hope this all made sense and that I'm actually typing this on my computer. For all I know, I'm sitting in the dining room right now, "typing" on a box that arrived this afternoon from Amazon with my BPA-free bottles. That would suck.