Friday, September 07, 2007

39 Weeks

168 this morning. AT HOME! Huh?

Bags? Packed.
Mother-in-Law? Coming soon.
Nursery? Ready to go.
Last trip to the bank? Accomplished.

Now all that's left to do is wait. WAITING SUCKS! I did a couple of errands yesterday and today and tried to walk as much as possible. I feel like sitting around makes Sesame lazy, and we do NOT want Sesame to be lazy. We want him to want to come OUT!

Last night I had to go to traffic court to fight a speeding ticket I got in May. Russ came with me and we got there at 6:00 PM, our scheduled time, only to see about 50 other people waiting in line in front of us. Apparently, you get an appointment time that is the same as EVERYONE ELSE'S APPOINTMENT TIME!

So, all of us chumps are waiting in this long line and a bailiff comes out at around 6:15 to tell us the staff hasn't arrived yet. Awesome. This is just what I want to be doing for the next three hours. Hanging out at the courthouse waiting to plead my case. I've never fought a traffic ticket before, but I know I'm in the right on this one. The officer said I was going 20 miles over the speed limit and I know for a FACT I was not. He obviously clocked someone else and made me the fall guy. I had facts and a hand-drawn map to back me up. Russ drew the map. Duh.

Anyway, at around 6:30 they called us all in to the courtroom and told us to sit down. Then they called our names one by one and had us sit in the center of the courtroom in groups of six. There were so many hard to pronounce names, that when it got to someone named Elizabeth Smith, the bailiff actually thanked her for having an easy name. "Thanks, Liz. That was easy".

When I got up they asked how pregnant I was. I said, "Nine months". They said, "Come up front so we can get you out of here. It's been three years since my EMT training and I don't want to have to use it." That's one of the perks of being pregnant, I guess.

Then we had to listen to a tape of our rights that answered absolutely no questions about what was about to happen. It basically told us that if we had committed a crime or a misdemeanor we had the right to an attorney and all that. But we were all there for traffic tickets! I almost scratched my name in one of the pews in the courthouse so I could be arrested for damaging federal property. I wasn't getting the five minutes back that it took to listen to the tape, so I at least wanted to put it to use. Are there pews in courthouses? Or are they just benches unless it's a church?

Then they told us that an attorney was giving his free time to hear our cases and that he wasn't getting paid so they could save taxpayer money. We all stood and solemnly applauded as he walked in. Just kidding. The "attorney" that entered the courtroom literally looked like a fat, gray-haired, homeless guy who they just pulled off the street. Sort of Stephen King in a judge's robe. He called me up and asked me how I plead. Pleaded? Plead. "Not guilty", says I, readying my paperwork and clearing my throat to argue my case. "Pay your bail at the clerk's window. Thank you", says Homeless Stephen King.

Is that it? Did my cop not show up? Am I done? NICE! Then I walk into the clerk's office only to discover that, not only am I NOT done, but this was just a bullshit way for them to get me there to schedule my ACTUAL COURT DATE!! WHAT??? So, I had to pay the full amount of the ticket and schedule another time to be there. I chose the written argument option instead, so I'll be sending a bunch of pages with maps and things to argue my case. If I win, I'll get my $273 back. If not, I'll then have the option to schedule a court date and argue in person.

RIDICULOUS!!

Russ, Sesame, and I wasted 90 minutes of our lives at that courthouse last night. I was so pissed.

I just wasted about six to ten minutes of your time, depending on how fast of a reader you are. That makes me feel better.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lisa,
Hang in there - if you think you aren't getting any sleep now, or doing any household chores now, or having difficulty typing now - just you wait. I guarentee you will be in love with Russ' mom!!! So nice she will be there to help.

Hang in there - be tough. You can do this!!
1/2 of The Blondes

4:47 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

YAY! Thanks for the comment, Blondie. Should I start actually using your name? It's so mysterious and interesting this way.

Can't wait to go for walks with you and the kids!!

9:52 PM  

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