Wednesday, November 21, 2007

November 21st

"I forgot the poop! I forgot the poop!"

This is the sentence I uttered as Russ, Garrett and I were leaving for the pediatrician the other day. I had a stool sample in a diaper in a plastic bag in the fridge and as Russ was shutting the door and setting the alarm, I realized I had forgotten it. The poop. And that is what I said. Just take that in.

We've been having a blast with the Littlest Arch. Although, when he went to the doc's the other day he had his first vaccinations which resulted in a terrible night for all of us. Mostly for Garrett. He seemed so happy all day after the shots. And then night fell, and Garrett turned into a screaming, crying, inconsolable mess. It was awful. He's O.K. now though, folks! And he's back to his beautiful, happy, very consolable self.

I realize I laugh a lot now. I mean, I've always laughed a lot, especially since marrying Russ, who makes me laugh harder than anyone else has ever made me laugh. But now I laugh at the littlest things. Any remotely adorable movement that our son makes makes me laugh with extreme glee or let out a happy scream.

I also cry a lot now, too. Sometimes I cry because I'm in such disbelief when I'm feeding and looking down at him. Sometimes I cry because I'm worried, or because I want so many things for him and I don't know how I'll give them to him. Stupid stuff. I can't help it. I love the little guy. Sue me.

In other news, my daddy came home Monday night from a nearly eight-week stint at City of Hope hospital. I mentioned a while ago that my dad had Mylofibrosis, a blood disease that kind of resembles Leukemia. I haven't wanted to write about it for several reasons. One, it's my dad's journey and I haven't felt like it was my story to tell. Two, I was pregnant the entire time my dad was getting sicker, going to many doctor's appointments, and getting many transfusions. I was dealing with so much, I felt sort of overwhelmed. And I wasn't comfortable writing down all the emotional stuff I was going through. Suffice it to say, the pregnancy marked a time of many fears and many joys all rolled into one. And Garrett's birth brought much needed happiness and hope to everyone in my family.

Well, my dad got a bone marrow transplant on October 10th, after being in the hospital for a while for tests and transfusions. The bone marrow was donated by a complete stranger who we are not allowed to know about until October 10th, 2008. I an amazed by this stranger's unbelievable generosity. My dad said from the beginning that his goal was to be out of the hospital in time to come to my house for Thanksgiving. It was a lofty, seemingly impossible goal. My dad was pretty damn sick going into the hospital and the doctors estimated a stay of at least 10 weeks.

My dad's attitude through this illness has been amazing. For almost a year he has been in all kinds of pain. He has lost his appetite and astounding amounts of weight. At times he was so nauseated that he and I would joke that BOTH of us were pregnant. Sleeping has been hard, and sometimes being awake has been harder. Through it all, my dad remained positive and celebrated every minute of feeling remotely normal.

Well, he'll be here for Thanksgiving tomorrow along with my mom who has tirelessly taken care of him for a year. He got tests result back today which revealed that all of his white cells are 100% host. That means the bone marrow transplant seems to have replaced all of his sick cells with brand new, healthy ones. It's the first jump in a long line of hurdles. He has to travel to the City of Hope twice a week for the next six months at least. He has to fight off possible infections, and his bone marrow has to reinvent itself. He can't travel far from his home for at least fifty days, and my amazing mom will be by his side for all of it. (Except when she needs a damn break and my brother or I step in!)

I believe my dad will conquer this. So does he. And we will all work together to make sure of it. He needs to be around to see Garrett grow up. My birthday is Friday and I'm getting the only gift I wanted. My parents will be at our table for Thanksgiving, and I have a beautiful baby who will be at his first holiday dinner. I am more thankful than I can even describe.



Blogger Bowler Hat Productions said...

You forgot the poop. CLASSIC.

Enjoy your daddy at your dinner table...

7:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Blessing be unto all your loved ones! Your Father's journey to perfect health is absolutely strengthened and energized by Garrett's arrival.
Don't wish for the miracle, expect them! and oh, Happy Birthday! AL

2:14 PM  

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